Nwana and Echege as Champions of Intimate Partner Violence

By Chris Agbedo

The horrific cases of Chioma Nwana and Chinonso Echege, victims of intimate partner violence (IPV) driven by accusations of infidelity, cast a dark shadow over the persistent dangers of patriarchy and toxic masculinity in Nigeria. Far from being isolated incidents, they are grim reminders of the systemic culture of violence against women fueled by entrenched societal norms that grant men unchecked authority over their wives. Chioma Nwana’s tragic death in Abagana, Anambra State, after being set ablaze by her husband, and Chinonso Echege's maimed life in Ibagwa-Ani, Enugu State, after her wrist was hacked off by her spouse, both stem from unfounded suspicions of marital infidelity. These heinous acts not only spotlight the physical dangers women face in their homes but also highlight the psychological warfare perpetuated by a patriarchal society that prioritizes control over mutual respect and partnership and places undue emphasis on ‘ndidi’ - endurance.

In patriarchal societies like Nigeria, women are often reduced to the status of property in their marriages. This toxic mindset enables men to view their wives’ perceived disobedience or autonomy as affronts to their masculinity, deserving of punishment and even outright death in some extreme cases. Suspicion of infidelity becomes a convenient excuse for such spineless men to exert dominance, masking insecurities and emotional immaturity under the guise of protecting their honour. The cases of Chioma and Chinonso illuminate the extremes to which such men will go when their patriarchal authority is perceived to be threatened. For Chioma, her life was cruelly snuffed out in a blaze of filthy anger. For Chinonso, her physical mutilation serves as a permanent scar of her husband’s deep-seated sense of entitlement and warped perception of justice. In the latter case, it was even alleged that Echege had aimed at Chinonso’s neck to chop the head off the ‘adulterous’ body but his wife raised her hands in defence of her dear life!

In examining these tragic events, it is crucial to interrogate the role of societal norms and cultural practices in perpetuating intimate partner violence. In many Nigerian communities, there exists an unspoken acceptance of spousal abuse, particularly when tied to suspicions of infidelity. The tragic cases of Chioma Nwana and Chinonso Echege, stemming from suspicions of infidelity, underscore the perilous consequences of cultural norms that perpetuate abuse. Among these norms is the societal expectation for women to "endure" marital challenges, even when those challenges manifest as violence, degradation, and emotional torment. Nowhere is this more apparent than in the Igbo interpretation of the word di (husband), which is often understood metaphorically as an abbreviation of dibe—“keep enduring.” This metaphorical framing encapsulates a dangerous narrative: that the burden of marital survival rests solely on the shoulders of women. Such cultural misalignments reinforce toxic marital dynamics, embolden abusive men, and stifle the voices of countless women trapped in cycles of violence and silence.

The Igbo linguistic tradition, rich in proverbs and metaphors, reflects the societal values and expectations of its people. In the case of di, the implicit demand for endurance carries significant weight. The cultural expectation that a wife must “keep enduring” in her marriage, no matter the circumstances, has become a quiet enabler of abuse. This notion transforms marriage from a partnership built on mutual respect into a one-sided commitment where women are expected to tolerate humiliation, violence, and neglect to uphold the sanctity of their union. In extreme cases, as with Chioma and Chinonso, this endurance becomes a death sentence. For naturally abusive men, this cultural framework serves as a shield. They are emboldened by the knowledge that their wives are unlikely to seek help or leave, fearing societal stigma, ostracism, or the label of failure. This tacit approval of abuse is further reinforced by family and community structures that prioritize the preservation of marriage over the well-being of the individuals within it.

The pressure to endure places an immense psychological burden on women. Many are forced to suppress their emotions, internalize their pain, and normalize their suffering. This not only erodes their mental health but also strips them of their agency. Women in such situations often feel trapped, with no viable options for escape or reprieve. The endurance narrative also perpetuates intergenerational cycles of abuse. Children who witness their mothers enduring violence grow up internalizing these dynamics as normal, perpetuating the same patterns in their own relationships. In this way, the metaphorical misalignment of di as dibe becomes a self-reinforcing cycle of violence and subjugation.

The common thread in both the Nwana and Echege cases is the theme of suspicion, a potent catalyst for violence in patriarchal marriages. Without concrete evidence, the husbands resorted to lethal and brutal acts, driven by their inability to process their emotions constructively. This lack of communication, compounded by a sense of ownership over their wives, led to catastrophic outcomes. Healthy relationships thrive on mutual trust and communication. However, in societies where men are raised to suppress emotional vulnerability and view dominance as a marker of masculinity, such attributes are often absent in marital dynamics. Rather than discussing their fears or concerns, these ‘strong men’ weaponize violence, leaving a trail of irreparable damage. For those who survive such attacks, like Chinonso Echege, the scars - both visible and invisible - serve as lifelong reminders of the brutality they endured. For those who do not survive, like Chioma Nwana, their deaths leave families and communities in mourning, while perpetuating a cycle of fear and subjugation among other women. Beyond the immediate victims, intimate partner violence has broader societal implications. Children who witness such acts often internalize these behaviours, perpetuating the cycle of abuse into future generations. Communities also bear the brunt of these tragedies, grappling with the loss of lives and the erosion of social cohesion.

In deconstructing the endurance trap and addressing the pervasive culture of dibe, we must challenge the societal norms and linguistic frameworks that sustain it. This requires a collective effort to shift the narrative around marriage and redefine the roles and responsibilities of spouses in a partnership. The term di should be reframed to emphasize partnership, respect, and mutual support, rather than endurance. Marriage should be understood as a union of equals, where both parties share the responsibility of maintaining harmony and addressing challenges. Traditional norms that glorify endurance must be replaced with values that prioritize individual well-being and mutual respect. Community leaders, religious institutions, and educators must play active roles in dismantling toxic masculinity and promoting healthy emotional expression. Women must be equipped with the knowledge and resources to recognize and resist abuse. Access to counseling, legal aid, and safe spaces can help them reclaim their agency and escape harmful relationships. Men must be included in efforts to dismantle the endurance narrative. By challenging toxic masculinity and encouraging men to view their spouses as equals, we can begin to shift the cultural perception of marriage from domination to partnership. Laws addressing domestic violence must be rigorously enforced, and perpetrators such as Nwana and Echege should face swift and decisive justice to deter others from similar acts. Additionally, victims and witnesses of intimate partner violence must feel safe and supported in reporting cases. Confidentiality, swift action, and victim-centered approaches are crucial in encouraging more women to come forward, ensuring that they are not left to endure their suffering in silence.

The allegorical tale of Omeke Ezugwu of Ejuona community- the legendary wife-beater - provides a stark reflection of the realities faced by many women in abusive marriages. From Oyiodo, who walked away, to Ojoko, who tragically lost her life, to Idenyi, who sought refuge in spiritual protection, and finally to Ọmada, who confronted her husband head-on with resilience, each woman’s response offers insights into the diverse ways women navigate the complexities of abuse. However, real-life cases like Chioma and Chinonso remind us that many women do not have the luxury of these allegorical outcomes. For every Oyiodo who escapes, there are countless Chioma who lose their lives. For every Ọmada who stands her ground, there are Chinonso who bear lifelong scars.

Moving beyond ‘dibe,’ the cases of Chioma and Chinonso remind us of the deadly consequences of a culture that prioritizes endurance over safety, agency, and respect. The endurance trap, encapsulated in the metaphorical interpretation of di as dibe, must be dismantled if we are to create a society where women can thrive without fear of violence or oppression. It is time to redefine what it means to be a di—not as someone whose authority demands endless endurance, but as a partner who values, cherishes, and respects their spouse. Until this shift occurs, the culture of endurance will continue to claim lives and perpetuate cycles of pain. Let us rise as a society to break free from the chains of dibe and build a future where love, respect, and equality are the cornerstones of every marriage.

Chioma Nwana and Chinonso Echege’s cases are not just stories of individual tragedies; they are wake-up calls for society to confront the pervasive culture of violence and patriarchy that endangers countless women daily. We must collectively advocate justice, support for survivors, and the dismantling of societal norms that perpetuate abuse. Until we achieve this, the cycle of violence will persist, leaving more Chioma and Chinonso in its wake - and society as a whole will continue to pay the price for its failure to protect its most vulnerable members. The time to cut the tail of Nwana and Echege as ‘champions’ of intimate partner violence is now.